


Regrets Dyed Red

by Kui



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Headcanon, M/M, Other, Wherein Shalnark is Kurta, Who took the same test Kurapika did and joined the troupe, yaaay fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-16
Updated: 2013-09-16
Packaged: 2017-12-26 17:19:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/968493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kui/pseuds/Kui
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shalnark has regrets about leaving his clan to die.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Regrets Dyed Red

**Author's Note:**

> stupid dumb headcanon fic about shalnark being a kurta and he feels really awful about leaving them  
> i mean have u SEEN what young shalnark looks like tell me that isn't kurta fashion (http://25.media.tumblr.com/8a893371f676c54cccb9a01830d442ee/tumblr_mrewbmihvC1rpfuy9o2_1280.jpg aka that and that pic is also what i loosely based the flashback off of,,,,)  
> ok have fun kiddies

Red. The color of his brethren’s eyes. A beautiful color, no? It was such a wondrous shade. The blonde can feel the tears fall. Clutching the glass case with a pair suspended in formaldehyde. The silent tears turned into a full on sob. A heaving sob. It rocked his frame, making the young boy’s body shake.  
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be with you all. But…”

The blonde sucks in a breath. 

“The Phantom Troupe is my new family.”

Shalnark stokes the case. What if these were mom’s eyes? Or his uncles? Hah. Shalnark humored the thought, another painful sob. He loved being in the phantom troupe. It was something he adored. Killing was fun. But, the second job they did after Shalnark had joined, was to mass murder his own kind. He just couldn’t forgive himself.

\---  
“Wait!” Shalnark cried to the other members. “Hm? Shal?” Pakunoda looked worried. “Is everything alright?” Shalnark’s mind screamed at him. ‘Say something, do something! They’re going to kill everyone! You idiot, ACT!’ He stayed frozen. “Um, I’ll watch over the base.” I d i o t. “Alright, kid. Call us if anythin’ comes up.” Uvogin shoots him a smile, Nobunaga nodding to the blonde. He fakes a smile, waving the troupe off. As soon as they leave, the blonde drops to his knees, and sobs. Heavy sobs. Like the ones he was doing right now. 

His eyes were fully scarlet, the young boy whispering the Kurta prayer over and over, each time his voice squeaking and cracking. He screamed in anguish after stumbling over the last line of the prayer. “I…Why didn’t I…do anything?” Was all he could manage, hugging his knees to his chest.

\---  
That was all he could manage to remember from that horrible night. He thought it would be amazing, joining the Phantom Troupe. It was, but…holding the gouged out eyes of one of his brethren was just spirit shattering. He thought going to the outside world would be the best thing! It was. He supposed. Getting his hunters license was fun, being in the troupe was fun, but he did miss his mom. He hoped that she forgave him, where ever she is. Up in the sky? Where just did dead people go? Shalnark was never sure. He had a shrine for these eyes, where he burned incense at. Everyone got a treasure they particularly liked. Shalnark obviously sprung for the eyes, no one questioned it. The others chose stranger things. 

It hurt. It stung.

Uvogin’s room happened to be right next door to Shal’s in the base. So, he couldn’t help but hear the young boy’s desperate sobs. The older man got up out of his bed, stretching, and scratching the back of his neck. He was worried for the young blonde boy. Could all of this stress from being in the troupe gotten to him? He wouldn’t blame him if he wanted to quit, it was a lot for such a young boy, he was only 17. 

He stumbled out of his room, and knocked on the door to Shalnark’s. The sobbing stopped as soon as he did. “Oi, Shal, you ok in there?” Shalnark hesitated. If he opened the door, Uvogin was going to see. But, they were very close… So, he hoped it didn’t matter. The blonde got up off of his knees, placing the pair of eyes back on the altar, pulling out another stick of incense, placing it in the holder, and lighting it with the old one, which he subsequently blew out. 

In the darkness of the room, he made his way around the bed, and to the door, still nowhere near calmed down. He turned the handle, and Uvogin’s eyes flew wide open at the sight. Shalnark’s eyes were a shining, brilliant scarlet. His green contacts were on the side table. His eyes were also bloodshot from crying, and tears were still streaming. Uvogin was shocked. Shalnark was…one of them? A Kurta? So, that explained why he took the eyes when Danchou was giving everyone a favorite of theirs. Shalnark averted Uvo’s shocked look. “I know. I’ve betrayed you all. You can take my eyes, if you want. I don’t want them anymo-” He’s cut off by Uvogin pulling him into a tight hug, Shalnark’s eyes now wide open. “You’re no traitor. Hisoka is. You’re nowhere near him. Just because you’re a Kurta doesn’t mean nothin’. But, I won’t tell nobody if ya want. You’re family, Shalnark.” The boy sobs into Uvogin’s chest. He runs much larger hands through the young boy’s silky blonde hair, trying to comfort him. 

After a while of Uvogin stroking the boy’s hair, and back, in order to make him feel better, Shalnark, emotionally and mentally exhausted, fell asleep on his lap. Uvo smiled, a warm smile, not that murderous one. He laid the boy on to his bed, pulled the covers over him, and gave him a peck on the forehead. Shalnark smiled in his sleep.

He could have sworn he saw his mother that night. He heard something along the lines of, ‘Your mother forgives you. And so does your friend. Please, forgive yourself, Shalnark.’

The smile he gave to Uvogin lasted the entire time he was asleep.


End file.
